Remember the Orphans

Why is Adoption So Expensive

I am asked this question FREQUENTLY. So frequently, that I wanted to take the time to write a blog post about it and share exactly WHY adoption costs so much. 

This information was taken from a pamphlet called "Adoption and the Orphan Crisis" produced by Show Hope: A Movement to Care for Orphans. You can find a link to this pamphlet at the bottom of this post.

If there are millions of waiting children in the world, why must it often cost tens of thousands of dollars to help bring them into the love and protection of a family? In an attempt to shed some light as to why adoption can be such a costly endeavor, we will focus on five main areas of financial expense that relate to adoption.

1. LEGAL: One of the major steps in the adoption process is to choose an adoption agency and/or attorney who will help to facilitate your adoption. Depending upon what type of adoptive placement you are seeking (private, international, domestic, etc.), your agency or attorney will be involved in navigating the referral process and will help you process your legal documents. Agencies and attorneys often have fees that vary based on the program you are pursuing and how much legal help is needed to move through the process.

Additionally, in the case of international adoptions, an attorney’s services are often needed in order to file “re-adoption” paperwork once your child is home. In all cases, your agency and/or attorney should be your best advocate as they guide you through extensive paperwork and necessary legal steps. The fees for this service can range broadly.

2. HOME STUDY: every adoptive family is required to complete a home study. home studies consist of multiple stages, starting with an orientation period. Initial information is recorded about the family and interviews are conducted to retrieve specific background information. Preparation training for adoptive parents is required along with home visits that ensure the home is safe and suitable for children.

In addition, health, income, and autobiographical information are required, as well as thorough background checks and fingerprinting. Lastly, personal references must be submitted in order to provide the most complete picture of the family.

After each stage of the home study, a report is created by the home study agency. These reports are combined to create the family’s portfolio which prospective agencies and birth parents can review based on the type of adoption

program.

After placement, a home study agency will also complete post- placement visits. These visits focus on making sure the child is doing well and thriving within their new family. The entire home study/ post-placement process can span many months to years (depending on how quickly a waiting child is placed into the family) and the cost is often impacted accordingly.

3. COUNTRY: The hague Convention was enacted by the United Nations in an attempt to thwart corruption/trafficking and preserve the right of orphaned children to experience the love and protection of a family through adoption. Under the convention, each country has its own program to place children internationally and determines its own adoption fees. For families living in the Us and adopting abroad, they can expect to pay fees for processing federal forms and paperwork as well as adoption fees for the specific country they are adopting through. With each country determining different fees and program costs, this area of expense can vary widely.

4. DOCUMENTATION: Documentation is required for each step of the adoption process. These documents make up the dossier that most international programs require, including proof of eligibility. each document is processed locally, then by the agency, state and federal government, and finally by the international government of the child’s country of origin.

Many adoption agencies require the documents to be sealed and notarized, which authenticates the application and dossier. If a family decides to adopt internationally, they will also have to submit paperwork to the UsCIs (U.s. Citizen and Immigration services) in order to receive citizenship for their child. This element is vital to the adoption process but can also add thousands of dollars to the overall cost.

5. TRAVEL: Whether the adoption is domestic or international, travel expense can usually be expected. Undoubtedly, travel for an international adoption can be quite expensive. In most international adoption cases, the family will visit the country and the child first. Then, once that country’s waiting period is over and the process is complete, the family will return to their child’s country of origin to complete the process and travel home with their child. The cost for this element of adoption varies widely based on time of travel and country of origin.

This information was taken from this document.

Because of Isaac Birthdays

A year ago, sixty-four families contributed to an adoption for our very first Because of Isaac couple: Grant and Elizabeth. A year ago, they brought home twin boys. And today, one year later, those twins turn one!

Grant and Elizabeth with their twins: Ethan (left) and Eli

Ethan in all his glory.

Eli taking it all in

We are currently just under $5,000 away from our third family, Ryan & Briana, completing their fundraising. I am asking EVERYONE who reads my blog regularly to consider a donation to this couple's adoption. Please email me at information@becauseofisaac.org or visit our website at www.becauseofisaac.org to find out how you can donate. We are so close to our goal but need the help of YOU to make this happen. Donations in ANY amount are welcome and helpful and you will forever be a part of one family's adoption story!

30 famous people who are adopted

1. Maya Angelou (poet and author)

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, and penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.” – Maya Angelou

2. Augustus Caesar (emperor of Rome)

3. Truman Capote (author)

4. Kristin Chenoweth (actress)

5. Eric Clapton (singer)

6. President Bill Clinton

“Perhaps there is no greater miracle than finding a loving home for a child who needs one.” – President Bill Clinton

7. Nat King Cole (singer)

8. Ted Danson (actor, adoptive father)

9. President Gerald Ford

10. Jamie Foxx (singer, actor)

11. Newt Gingrich (politician)

12. Faith Hill (singer)

“I have a lot of respect for my birth mother…I know she must have had a lot of love for me to want to give me what she felt was a better chance.” – Faith Hill

13. Scott Hamilton (professional skater)

14. John Hancock (U.S. Founding Father)

15. Steve Jobs (co-founder of Apple)

16. Eartha Kitt (singer, actress)

17. John Lennon (singer)

18. Art Linkletter (TV personality)

19. Nelson Mandela (human rights activist)

“There can be no keener revelation of a society’s soul than the way in which it treats its children.” – Nelson Mandela

20. Tim McGraw (singer)

21. Sarah McLachlan (singer)

22. Marilyn Monroe (actress)

23. Michael Oher (professional football, story inspired The Blind Side)

“It’s true that we can’t help the circumstances we’re born into and some of us start out in a much tougher place than other people. But just because we started there doesn’t mean we have to end there.” – Michael Oher

24. Edgar Allen Poe (author)

25. Priscilla Presley (actress)

26. First Lady Nancy Reagan

27. First Lady Eleanor Roosevelt

28. Babe Ruth (professional baseball player)

29. Dave Thomas (founder of Wendy’s, children’s advocate)

“Everyone’s got to be for a child to have a home and love. I mean, I don’t know anyone who would be against that.” – Dave Thomas

30. Leo Tolstoy (author)

*** I am continuing to update this page regularly on my main blog page. Click here to see if I have added any new people to the list.

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P.S. We'd like to add our favorite adoptees in our house: Superman, Kun Fu Panda, Jesus, Moses, and the girls on Despicable Me! Others include: George Washington Carver, John James Audubon and Aristotle. 

Download the FREE 15-page guide on Understanding Adoption and the Orphan Crisis 

What Isaac Knows

At the court hearing that made us a forever family!

One of the most common adoption questions that I currently hear surrounds how much Isaac knows. "Does he know he is adopted?" or "Does he understand he is adopted?" or "How much does he know?"

It's a good question, and I wanted to take the opportunity to answer it in detail. I use a lot of my blog entries to send to people who are asking questions. The more I can get "written", the less times I have to write it out over and over again. So here's what Isaac, and consequently Sidge (Abigail is too young to understand) know and talk about:

Isaac knows that he adopted.

He knows that he was in Bri's belly.

He knows that his brother and sisters were in my belly.

He knows that Joan and Roy and Bri are in our family even though they don't live with us.

He knows that he has other family members he barely knows that love him without meeting him or having met him often.

He knows that he was adopted like Jesus and Moses and Kung Fu Panda and Superman.

He knows and uses the word adopted and birth mom. He will never hear those words and be shocked by them. But I imagine there will come a point that he says, "What does that exactly mean that I am adopted?" or "What does that mean that I have and adopted mom and a birth mom?" 

Isaac's birthfather is not in the picture and most likely he won't be. We imagine there will come a day that he will ask about him. We will cross that bridge when we come to it. For now, we plan to tell him, when he asks, that his birthfather loved Bri and supported her as she grew Isaac in her baby and gave him life. But then, they decided to part ways, and our families did not know each other and therefore we do not have contact with him. If Isaac decided to seek him out when he is grown, we will support him in that desire. 

Isaac understands that Bri is now married. He doesn't understand at this point that he could one day have half brothers and sisters if Bri and her new husband, Robert, have children. This is exciting for me because Bri is also adopted. This means that the only person Isaac has in his life that is genetically related to him is Bri. It will be exciting if he has other brothers and sisters genetically related to him.

We do not fear the future in regards to Isaac's adoption. We do not believe that adopted children have any bigger issues than biological children.

When a child is "troubled" and biological, no one says, "Oh, it must be because they are biologically related to their parent." Why then do they say, "Oh, it must be because they are adopted?" We very well could have one of our biological children give us much more of a headache then Isaac. We will not attribute any "issues" any of our kids may or may not have to anything other than their choices -- not their genes.

I'd love to answer more questions on this topic. If you have any, please feel free to leave them in the comments. Any kind question will be kindly answered!

Adoption commercial

A tad corny but worth sharing: